Issues, Labor Issues, Quotes & Excerpts, Thea's Thoughts

Working Smarter Rather Than Just Working Hard

Because of the recent tragedy in our family, I’d been reflecting on what are the most important things in life. A few of the things I’d been thinking about are time and work. Don’t get me wrong. I love what I do for work. I’m thinking about how I’m going to juggle quality time with my little munchkin and being my best at work at the same time. Because of this, I’d been reflecting on about the American perception of working hard. I’d been hearing about this “working smart” idea for the longest time and I want to apply it to my life somehow.

Making Time
Making Time

Working smart is not about working less or not working hard at all. I think working smart is about finding the job that you’re passionate about, balancing life and work by spending quality time with your family, taking care of your health and rejuvenate, and still have time to take care of your chores.

According to the American Psychological Association, we have an overstressed nation. “As the aftershocks of the Great Recession continue to be felt across the country, money (76 percent), work (70 percent) and the economy (65 percent) remain the most oft- cited sources of stress for Americans. Job stability is on the rise as a source of stress; nearly half (49 percent) of adults reported that job stability was a source of stress in 2010 (compared to 44 percent in 2009). At the same time, fewer Americans are satisfied with the ways their employer helps them balance work and non-work demands (36 percent compared to 42 percent in 2009).” This stress could translate to physical and mental health problems.

I don’t always agree on Bill Maher’s politics but on this one he has a point: “Our politicians love to brag, “The American worker is the most productive worker in the world.”  Yeah, ’cause they work scared. That’s why a majority don’t even take all of the few vacation days they get.  Because you don’t want to seem less valuable to your boss…”

There’s a movement named, “Take back your Time” which is working on ideas for an action and a comprehensive program to win more free time for Americans. They have a website:

http://www.timeday.org/

Also, they’re promoting a bill called” The Minimum Leave Protection, Family Bonding and Personal Well-Being Act:

http://www.timeday.org/right2vacation/Minimum%20Leave%20Protection%20Bill.pdf

I’d been thinking about how this proposed bill would mean to me. I work on a contractual basis and I think about what will happen when my contract ends this year.  I really like where I’m working now which have a flexible working time. Because our government  don’t have any mandated vacation time, I worry about the next job that comes along.  Would it have the same working conditions that I have now?

I’ m also thinking about the employer’s perception on single parents. Even if there’s a considerable progress that has been made here in this country, there’s still a perception that if you’re a woman and you’re the sole provider for the child, you’re somehow limited on what you can do at work. I think that if you’re not available to work overtime because you need to pick up your child at school at a certain time or you have to take a half day off so you can be with your child  for their dance recital, it doesn’t mean that you’re not capable of the job. I think that mandating vacation time would protect my quality time for my son,  for myself and still be productive at the same time.

It’s ironic how Americans joke about how other industrialized nations have mandated vacation time with an average of 20 days paid time off on top of public holidays and sick leaves and yet, we secretly wish we have the same thing.

Grief & Loss, Healing, Quotes & Excerpts, Reminiscing, Thea's Thoughts

Halloween 2012

Happy Halloween
Happy Halloween

Holidays are difficult without Steve. It’s a reminder that we’re celebrating these important days without him. Last year, we spend Halloween at the East Coast. It’s one of our favorite holidays, especially for my brother in law. It also gives us an excuse to be silly & wear costumes. Steve is not a costume-y kind of guy. The most costume that he would wear would be a devil’s horn that I bought for him years ago for the West Hollywood Halloween Parade but he loved bringing along the little munchkin for trick or treating. This time I decorated a little bit outside our home. I think I was  making a concerted effort to compensate for Steve’s absence.

Happy Halloween
Happy Halloween
Halloween 2011
Halloween 2011

This year, we had full day celebrating Halloween. The nursery had a little Halloween party with the kiddos  wearing costume during the day.  I left early from work so  I can bring the little one trick or treating at the mall since they stop giving treats at 7pm. Then I brought him to the Los Angeles Live Steamers to ride the Halloween Train. Before the night ends, we drove all the way to a family friend’s Halloween Party to meet up with my cousins and celebrate the rest of the Halloween night there. The little munchkin was wearing his dinosaur costume, playing around with my cousins roaring and eating los of candies and chocolates. He definitely had a sugar overload that day.

Halloween 2011
Halloween 2011
Halloween 2011
Halloween 2011

The next day when he woke up, instead of asking eggs for breakfast, he was asking for a lollipop. That made me smile.

Halloween 2011
Halloween 2011
Halloween 2011
Halloween 2011
Grief & Loss, Healing, Quotes & Excerpts, The Aftermath, Thea's Thoughts

Are you a Grief Victim or a Grief Survivor?

Being a victim is a state of mind dictated by others.

A survivor dictates his or her own state of mind.

 

A victim fears the moments of grief.

A survivor welcomes those moments!

 

A victim knows about feeling down and tries to stay up.

A survivor knows feeling down is okay.

 

Steve's pumpkin tree
Steve’s pumpkin tree

 

A victim tries hard to hide the tears.

A survivor never leaves home without kleenex.

 

A victim struggles to maintain a state of normalcy.

A survivor knows normal no longer exists.

 

A victim gets caught in isolation.

A survivor reaches out when they need to.

 

A victim is afraid they in time will forget.

A survivor knows they never will!

 

A victim sometimes feels guilty laughing.

A survivor laughs through their tears.

 

A victim tries at times to block out the memories.

A survivor embraces memories of all kinds.

 

A victim wants someone to cure his or her grief.

A survivor just wants someone to share his or her journey.

 

A victim struggles to get over their grief.

A survivor fights to get through it.

 

A victim tries to get on with their life.

A survivor lives their life knowing nothing will ever be the same.

 

A victim says, “Oh I’m okay”…then secretly cries.

A survivor openly cries… and says, “I’m okay.”

 

~Author Unknown

 

I came across this piece from the support group that I attend to whenever I can. I hope that somehow this will help someone who is also suffering from a loss.