Kelly Jolkowski, the Founder & President of Project Jason is helping me & my family to keep the awareness going that my husband, Steve is still missing. They have a program called, 18 Wheels Angels which, “is an all volunteer program in which truck drivers volunteer their time and resources to help locate missing loved ones. Target Media Partners works with Project Jason to provide additional assistance for families of the missing by publishing the photos and information for each featured campaign in their monthly magazines, Through the Gears, TruckJobSeekers, and Independent Contractor. These publications have a circulation of 150,000, and can be found at truckstops and other businesses nationwide.”
I never thought I would be in a position where I would be talking to a counselor about trauma. I thought all the Oprah shows I had watched would have prepared me for anything – but not this. All the caring thoughts and messages from the facebook to personal messages I received, I really do appreciate and it does help me. I told my counselor that I needed something more. I needed to talk to or connect to people who had been or who does have the same predicament that I do, that have a loved one missing. My counselor was wise enough not to suggest a bereavement group because I just balked at that thought. Because no one knows for sure what happened to Steve, not even the FBI or the Burbank Police Department, and not even the psychics of the world.
I live in a nightmare that never ends.
I now sleep in a dreamless state. And if I do dream about Steve, I can’t remember what it was when I wake up. I wake up in the morning and I still unconsciously reach out on the other side of the bed where he used to be sleeping. Steve usually brings our little munchkin from his room to our bed & we all lay down there snuggling for a few minutes. The little one finishes his milk and we all get up to get ready for the day. Most of the time, we both bring our packed lunch & have breakfast at work, too. In the corner of the dining room, his lunch bag is still there but empty. So, dinner is an important part of the day for the three of us. We’re all together, eating together as a family but now he’s not there.
As I said a few days ago, there are hundreds of people that’s missing everyday. I was stunned by that information when Steve went missing. Slowly, I’m learning all this stuff about W.O.M. (The World Of the Missing) in finding resources on how to bring Steve back home to us safely.
I stumbled through Project Jason online when I came across stories of families whose loved one is missing. I just submitted Steve’s case to them. Their mission as a non profit organization: “is to create and increase public awareness of missing people through a variety of outreach and educational activities. Project Jason seeks to bring hope and assistance to families of the missing by providing resources and support.“
No one really knows what to do when a loved one goes missing. Maybe if I’d seen the Missing Person’s Primer of the Hope for the Missing’s website from the very first day, it could have helped me early on. But I was totally devastated and still am.
When the media outlets reached out to me and my family that first week, I wasn’t ready. No one can be ready for this. I was hoping and praying that the FBI, BPD, other law enforcement agencies and volunteers would be able to find him at that time. I thought they would be able find him in a few days with all that resources they have on hand. But they all came out empty-handed. No clue at all except for that singular scent of him that the bloodhounds picked up from our home to the Stough Canyon Nature Center which doesn’t really confirm if he even went there on the same day because according to the LE’s, human scent can stay within the travel path up to three weeks.
I talked to Detective Gordon who is the lead detective on this case. Because of the leads we got from Let’s Bring Steve Home Volunteer Search Activity from the past two weekends, the BPD are now following this up. They’ll be sending out again a new all-points bulletin or BOLO’s (be on the look out) to the other law enforcement agencies and focusing on the San Fernando Valley.
There were concerns raised by the volunteers on how fast the response would be if just in case, there would be a live sightings about Steve. Meaning, a search volunteer saw Steve right there and then. Detective Gordon assured me that Burbank Police Department would definitely respond immediately if they call the phone number listed on the flyer: (818) 238-3000.
Our goal is ultimately to bring Steve home safely but we also have these other goals that there’ll be an actual physical search activity and now it’s starting to happen again. I owe that to all the volunteers who had participated. Continue reading “46 Days”
“An astounding 2,300 Americans are reported missing every day, including both adults and children.”~ America’s Missing by David Krajicek
I’d never thought that Steve will be part of that number. I’d never thought that our family will experience this. But one thing I can say is that the urgency to find a loved one whether it’s a child or an adult should be the same.
“Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.”~ Maya Angelou
Today, I want to list down what I’m grateful for at the moment:
You’ll never know what tomorrow will bring.
Tomorrow morning at 7AM, there’ll be more than a dozen volunteers – made up of family and friends as well as concerned citizens who will come together to post missing person fliers and search for my husband, Stephen “Steve” Ivens who was last seen at our home last May 10. The search volunteers will be divided into three groups: The first will focus on the Verdugo Mountains, the second will go to homeless shelters, soup kitchens and train stations around the San Fernando Valley area, and the last will hit Griffith Park trails. The search party will assemble at McCambridge Park at 7 a.m. before leaving for their assigned search locations.
We’re lucky enough that G.I. Joe Search & Rescue Team will be joining us to help locate Steve and CBS-LA will be covering this voluntary search activity.
You’re very much welcome to join us to pick up flyers & post it at assigned areas or within your vicinity even if you can’t hike with us. Not everyone will be hiking.
We’re organizing a voluntary search party to search for Steve & post flyers this coming Saturday, June 23, 2012 from 7:00am until 5:00pm, McCambridge Park, 1515 North Glenoaks Boulevard, Burbank, CA. Meeting place will be at the picnic tables in front of the playground.
Group A: Verdugo mountains, 2-3 people per trail
Group B: homeless shelters, soup kitchens, telephone booth at Sunland, Tujunga, Glendale, Burbank, North Hollywood, La Crescenta, San Fernando.
Group C: Griffith Park trails if there are more people coming in
Please indicate if you’ll be able to go to the Verdugo mountain.
Need to bring: proper clothing attire (check the weather), hiking boots/ rubber shoes, swiss knife/scissors to cut tape, 1st aid kit, sunscreen, hat, walking stick, whistle, camera, binoculars.
We’ll provide: We’ll provide flyers, maps, waters & granola bars, duct tape to post the flyers.